You might need to sit down for this: 93% of our communication with each other is non-verbal. And 55% of that is through our body language; the remaining 38% is tone of voice.
This means that, without being fully conscious of it, you’re constantly sending out messages to the world—who you are and how you feel. The way you walk, your posture, how you sit in a chair, what you do with your eyes and hands; your movements and body shapes—subtle and not so subtle—have the power to inspire other or make them nervous, evoke openness or instil distrust.
This non-verbal communication evolved from a time when we hadn’t yet developed a spoken language. When we were cavemen and “Ooga-ooga” simply wouldn’t cut it, we used our bodies to express our feelings. Whether we felt happiness, fear, anger, friendship—we moved and gestured in different ways to show it. Since the advent of the internet and social media, our means of communication have evolved to level that would have been incomprehensible even twenty years ago, but our non-verbal messaging remains as basic and as effective as it was at the very beginning of our time on Earth.
Get out your power pose
Considering that people form an impression of you within 20 seconds of meeting, what your body is saying can have a profound impact on your personal and professional life. Is your posture upright or do you slouch? Are your arms folded or are you open? In meetings, do you lean back from the table and take glances at your phone, or are you leant forward, engaged and making eye contact?
And these are not superficial acts. Studies have shown that the ‘power pose’—standing chest out with your hands on your hips—boosts testosterone levels; a withdrawn, submissive posture increases cortisol levels, which reduces confidence and drive. Similarly, slouching has been found to induce feelings of sadness and low motivation, while folding hands, smiling and other actions form part of ‘mirroring’. This is a process driven by things called ‘mirror neurons’ which cause us to consciously or subconsciously mimic another’s gestures. This mimicry can generate trust and empathy as well as resolve conflict. Mirroring happens all the time. Contagious yawning is an example. Also, next time you’re in a public space like the train or at the checkout till, try smiling at a stranger and see what happens.
Photo by Bruce Mars on Pexels
An excuse to drink more tea
In Evolve’s ‘Evolving Communication’ Peer Group workbooks, ‘Non-Verbal’ features as one of the key elements of communication both personally and within a business. It reads: “In order to foster an atmosphere of trust and positivity you have to communicate frequently, effectively and openly with everyone in your company… What new ideas would transform communications for you? Examples might be: use of technology, creating stand up style meetings, body language coaching…”
‘Embodied cognition’ is an emerging and fascinating field of psychology that looks at the way our bodies interact with other objects effects feelings and perceptions, both of yourself and others.
A paper by John Bargh, a renowned social psychologist at Yale University, revealed, amongst others things, the following: sitting in a hard chair makes someone less open to compromise than if they were in a soft chair; people holding heavy clipboards tended to take their job more seriously and—great news for us tea-obsessed Brits—holding a warm drink made people see others as more generous and caring than those holding a cold one.
Further experiments in embodied cognition examined the effects of physicality in memory and cognisance—children were found to solve maths problems better and faster if they used their hands while thinking, actors recalled their lines more easily when moving around on stage and subjects who were asked to move their eyes in a set pattern before working on a brainteaser were more likely to solve it.
What all this means is our brain and body are intricately linked and form a powerful combination. Together, they have the ability to inspire, command respect and make others around you feel comfortable. All of this without you uttering a word.
So next time you’re about to walk into an important meeting or presentation, check yourself and ask what your body is saying.